We’ve all been in the humiliating situation where our child makes a scene through it’s screams, rants and kicks but nothing is worse that when they do it in front of peers, friends and family. Don’tworry! We have all been there and I have some tips to help you.
Imagine the scenario if you will. Your toddler has just begun the infamous terrible twos…and he’s only one and a half. You’ve taken him swimming in the morning. It always tires him out and the afternoon therefore goes a lot more calmly. You can settle down to do some reading with him, maybe a spot of drawing or playing with his oodles of trucks and cars. The afternoon will be beautifully settled and calm.
Suddenly reality hits! You arrive home and glance at the calendar. You realize that you are supposed to take your little one to a party…in an hour! Grabbing your coat you thrust your little treasure back in to the car seat and speed off to ToysRus to buy the gift you haven’t bought.
Your little boy wants to hold each plastic army figure, swing on the nursery furniture and test out the pushchairs and car seats on show. You cannot get out of the store. You pick him up and move to the check out. The first tantrum begins. You buy him toys on a regular basis – just not today. His screams paint you as a liar. He’s got loads of toys at home. You begin to panic and verbalize it for the benefit of the judging public.
He begins to kick at your hips. You just need to pay and go. Your mind races in embarrassed frustration. I don’t let my child kick but I have to pay and go. I mustn’t yell. It’s all you want to do though and it might calm him. It’s an aggressive response and I am already losing my ‘Mary Poppins’ perfect mummy image. Instead, you try the passive aggressive warning. ‘If you don’t stop kicking mummy, you’ll go on the naughty step!.’ there is no naughty step in sight. His continuance to scream may as well be a hearty laugh in your face and is a terrible reflection on your parenting skills.
But, it’s not. All parents have been here. The person who claims that their child is fabulous all the time clearly has more privileges than you which allows them to live in a parallel universe where all children are born with perfect social behavior with no need to learn.
Humans can demonstrate the worst kind of fickle behavior. Despite most of us having had experience of children’s tantrums, there’s always someone who has the disdainful frown which metaphorically shouts TUT-TUT! Forget about these people. They’re probably having a bad day and are exacting their frustrations on you. Don’t let them layer you in their negativity. You’ve enough on you hands. Hard as it is, ignore these people. It’s what they deserve!
Tantrums are just a part of your child’s development and learning. How can a child learn if they never do wrong? How can they know what to expect from you if they don’t push you? It doesn’t make it any easier on the parent when the tantrums are occurring, but know that it’s not just happening to you and it’s not your parenting! Your child is merely going through its rite of passage.
More Toddler Parenting Resources:
Awesome List of Handmade Toddler Toys